Re: UPDATING readability

Harti Brandt wrote:
> On Sat, 16 Oct 2004, David Syphers wrote:
> 
> DS>On Saturday 16 October 2004 01:53 am, Matteo Riondato wrote:
> DS>> Could we change an entry from:
> DS>>
> DS>> 20041007:
> DS>>         One of the syscalls the 1:1 threading library libthr uses has
> DS>>         changed, thus breaking ABI compatibility. Make sure you  rebuild
> DS>> this library with the kernel.
> DS>>
> DS>> to:
> DS>>
> DS>> 20041007:
> DS>>         One of the syscalls used by the 1:1 threading library libthr
> DS>>  has changed, thus breaking ABI compatibility. Make sure you  rebuild
> DS>> this library with the kernel.
> DS>>
> DS>> I think this will improve the readability and the comprension of the
> DS>> entry by the non-native english speakers.
> DS>
> DS>I hate to be pedantic, but the original entry is preferable. In English it is 
> DS>correct to avoid the passive voice when possible (though not nearly to the 
> DS>extent that, say, French does). The active voice is quite appropriate here, 
> DS>where the subject is clearly defined. Is there a particular reason why 
> DS>non-native speakers would prefer the passive voice?
> 
> The verbs are coming very late in the sentence. That's not a problem for 
> german speakers :-) but from experience I know that speakers from 
> languages where the verb must come near the beginning of the sentence have 
> a problem with this. The omission of the 'that' makes that even harder, 
> because you can't parse the sentence into grammatical units until you see 
> the 'uses' at the end of the line. That forces you to roll back and 
> re-parse.

Would it be appropriate to flip the order of the sentances 
around?  This would avoiding having two distinct 
noun-phrases in the first sentance, which is where I think 
the verb confusion is coming in:

20041007:
	The 1:1 threading library, libthr, must be rebuilt when 
building a kernel.  One of the syscalls it uses has changed, 
thus breaking ABI compatibility.


-- 
-- Mike

Still using IE? Get Firefox!
http://www.spreadfirefox.com/?q=affiliates&id=6492&t=1